I got so angry! History repeating itself. There are so many memories of the same happening to me, and my friend also has quite some disturbing memories. From very young age up till now. I am 55 years of age today and although such things aren’t occurring anymore because I am not seen as ‘attractive’ to men in general no longer – I still do not feel safe out there: out of ‘life time programming’.
I’ve realized many years ago already: I have never allowed myself to express myself fully when in the presence of men. From small things like ‘keeping my legs closed’ when in male company to not fully expressing myself in dancing, and many many more examples.
I have never been free to fully express myself when in presence of men because at so many occasions I’ve experienced men allowing themselves to consider me ‘behaving like that’ as a clearance for them to touch me, grab me. So I was always holding back – often not sure what exactly gave these men the idea I was there for them to grab me?
The daughter I was talking about started to blame herself – ‘what did I do wrong to make this happen?’
The feminine stand in this is in general blaming themselves – because that is what we are told and programmed to believe. You should not behave like this or that. You should not dress that way – “you are asking for it”. You should not be out on the streets by yourself. You should not give men the idea you are interested. You should not have that expression on your face. You should not move your body that way. You should not swim naked. You should not… etc. The women who read this will all have their examples of ‘you should not, because you are a woman and men will…”
Men and boys on the other hand are not taught rules like this. It is still common to regard men as the predator and women as the prey. And men are allowed a lot for them to catch their prey – harassment included – sanctioned by society.
Women are NOT the sole ‘owner’ of their body
– men are…
A girl riding home on her bicycle – she is a prey and there are men allowing themselves to behave like predators like in the wild – the girl being there for them to hunt. What a frightening, dangerous and degenerated ‘game’ that get women harassed, assaulted and raped. Women are not the sole ‘owner’ of their body – men are…
I invite you to comment, both women and men, to investigate how to eliminate this predator-prey programming. Because I realize men are programmed to behave like this and they are allowing themselves to live this program – like women are allowing themselves to live by these rules and deprive themselves of expressing themselves. There is so much more to be said about this topic – the influence of the Bible (and other ‘holy books) for instance.