Traffic and Feelers

Self Corrective Statement

When and as I see myself participating in the pattern of not trusting myself and my eye sight when in traffic – I stop, I breathe. I realize it is not just my eye sight to rely on when in traffic, but other senses as well: hearing and ‘feelers’ = being aware and being Here. I breathe and investigate how to rely  on my feelers in conjunction with my hearing and eye-sight.

Interesting point here. I am not trusting my eye sight when in traffic – most of the time I feel insecure whether I misjudge the situation or not. I am not that aware of the insecurity because this is what I have been doing for so long. I lost sight in my right eye as a kid. Since then I’ve learned to estimate distances, but it is just that: estimating. I am quite good at it though :) My mom used to warn me often when riding of on my bike to be careful because of my ‘bad eye-sight’.

I started believing I am in danger and a danger when in traffic – more than other ‘normal sighted’ people. Common sense tells me there is truth in it, but now I am not able to distinguish what is actual truth here and what part is merely a belief. Am I overreacting by being that insecure? Of course I do not need to be insecure: I have to investigate where I am ‘over-careful’.

I know I am relying on my hearing for a part, but also on the ‘feelers’, the antenna – but not trusting it. Like a make belief – statement: ah well, I can trust on my antenna and cross the street with eyes closed. Not recommendable lol. So I will be investigating this. How to practical apply this as a certainty and not as a make belief-statement. This is what I can apply as a self-corrective statement at this moment – I will breathe, no, first I will stop – lol – before crossing the street, I breathe and investigate the antenna thing.