I am more able of selfhonesty, more able to look straight into/through my mind set when I wake up. The moments after waking up I am so much more clear, so much more able to team up with my mind (?) - unfortunately most of the time I have to get up immediately because of daily things, like assisting Dj in getting ready for school. But in the weekends I am able to stay in bed a bit longer and 'wander around in myself'. That's when I see things, notice things, become aware of things.
So why don't I wake up myself earlier so I can stay in bed for another hour?
Because I am sooo very tired...
Why am I sooo very tired?
Because by the time the alarm clock goes of I usually haven't slept for more than 3 - 4 hours.
So the answer lies in going to bed and sleep earlier and sleep an hour longer. Simple as that, buuuuuuuuuuuuut...........
But I do like the nights, when it is quiet around me, almost everybody is sleeping and the world is mine alone :)
I used to be more creative at night, more able to see and confront myself, my thoughts and feeling could wander free etc. I realise that times have changed, I need some other construct: this is 'practical' time - how to make my scripting effective, how to practically apply. Going to bed earlier and waking up earlier is probably more supportive than the nightly 'wonder walks' I used to have. So of ya go.
Interesting video on tiredness:
Never did the SF list on 'sleep' so for a starters:
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to believe that I need and must have sufficient sleep otherwise if I don’t – I’ll be tired
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become dependant on sleep
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to believe that ‘lack of sleep’ exist – and that if I were to ‘lack sleep’ – I will be tired
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define ‘lack of sleep’ to tiredness
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed to believe that tiredness exist
I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to realise that tiredness is an idea / belief designed of the mind, accepted and allowed as ‘normal’ due to ‘lack of sleep’
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that sleeping 8 – 9 hours or more is healthy for my human physical body
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define sleeping as healthy
I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to realise, see or understand that sleeping is a system the mind system use to alter / change / update itself – while / during I am unconscious
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use / abuse sleep as an escape from my reality, manipulating the reason and cause for sleeping through ‘making it sound acceptable’ through believing sleeping 8 – 9 hours or more is healthy
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use sleep as a method of hiding from self responsibility and facing myself within and as my reality in every moment as the moment as the breath
I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to realise that the body only requires rest for a maximum of 6 hours – and that’s it
I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to realise that the mind is the directive principle of me – as it has the ability to induce perceptual tiredness, which is the mind consciousness systems’ ‘signal / sign’ that it requires regeneration and rejuvenation – which is done through sleeping 8 – 9 hours or more
I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to realise that tiredness and sleep exist within the mind of the mind – it is not who I am
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be directed, influenced and controlled by the mind – through it informing me when it’s ‘tired’, then using me to ‘sleep’ while it rejuvenates and regenerates and replenishes itself as it takes me on the journey through my subconscious and unconscious mind – to ‘allocate’ manifestations to pre-occupy me during another day while I’m ‘awake’
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed my mind to use me – I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to realise that abuse exist within self, through accepting and allowing myself to be abused by the mind – and because I accept / allow this within me – I accept / allow this within the rest of the world as me
I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to realise that ‘sleeping’ and ‘awake’ is also polarity manifestations of the mind – I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to realise that it’s the mind that sleeps and it’s the mind that wakes up and thus – that I have never really lived
I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself realise that the ‘normalcy’ of sleeping 8 – 9 hours a day is accepted and allowed by all of humanity within and of the unified consciousness field because it’s the exact amount of time the mind requires to allocate manifestations within the unconscious mind, then to merge them into the conscious mind as the mind ‘wakes’ – I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to realise that the manifestations merged into the conscious mind, extracted from the unconscious mind is of the unified consciousness field from other human beings – yet – the moment I believe a thought to be me, as me, - I make such manifestations my own and in this moment – I infuse other human beings’ thought patterned behaviours / habits within and as the mind consciousness system that exist within me – and thus such manifestations become me
I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to realise that the mind is ‘at work’ while I ‘sleep’ – conjuring and gathering manifestations of any and all kinds, extracted from the unconscious mind – to merge into my conscious mind, so I believe that such manifestations to be me, because it exists in my mind – and so the mind consciousness system within me ‘upgrades itself’ every evening I ‘sleep’
I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to realise that dreams are used by the mind consciousness system to divert my attention while I sleep to not actually understand / know what’s really going on while I sleep – therefore – dreams were meaningless
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that who I am exist as thoughts, feelings and emotions – needing ‘lots of sleep’ for a ‘healthy life’
I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to realise that ‘lots of sleep’ 8 – 9 hours or more – is healthy for the mind consciousness system within me as that which I have accepted and allowed myself to become
I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to realise that ‘the difficulty of waking up in the mornings’ is my emergence as the mind from the unconscious, to the subconscious to the conscious mind – which ‘takes a while’ – then when I’m ‘awake’ and ‘up’ – it’s actually me as the conscious mind, actively participating within and of the unified consciousness field
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to define who I am as sleep / sleeping
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to define who I am as tired / tiredness
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in the pre-occupation and attention diversion of the mind as thoughts/feelings/emotions to not accept or allow myself to experience myself as the breath of life as the moment – here as who I am
I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to realise that who I am is the breath as the breath as the moment – here
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe/think that if I sleep ‘less than’ I usually do – I will be tired the next morning – instead of realising that I am designing the very experience of tiredness in the morning through the perceptual belief/idea that less sleep equals tiredness
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed the idea/belief of ‘less sleep than I usually have’ equals tiredness the next morning – which influence the experience of me within and throughout the entire day – instead of remaining here as the breath as me in every moment
I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to wake up in the morning as the breath as me as the moment as me
I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to realise that it’s the mind that struggles to wake up in the mornings – as it merges with me as me from the unconscious mind to the subconscious mind to the conscious mind – where it eventually later ‘wakes up’ completely
I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to realise that in the mornings when I open my eyes and I accept / allow myself to participate in one singular thought – I ‘activate’ all the workings / findings / manifestations the mind retrieved and obtained within the unconscious mind while I was being pre-occupied through dreams - referred to as sleeping – and then allow / accept all such manifestations to infuse within me as me – and thus become such manifestations as thought patterns and behaviours within and of the unified consciousness field.
I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to realise that sleeping is literal sleep – the complete submerge of me, as the mind does it’s work – because I as who I am is not aware
I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to realise that ‘awakening’ and ‘awake’ that exist within and of the unified consciousness field – is the ‘awake’ and ‘awakening’ of the mind in it’s entirety – that it’s not to be awake – but to live practically as who I am which is here as the moment as the breath as me – because for ‘awake / awakening’ to exist – ‘sleep / sleeping’ must exist – the ‘awake/awakening’ for the mind of the mind and the ‘sleep / sleeping’ for me of me, disappearing into the background within myself until I no longer exist and only the mind as what I have accepted and allowed myself to become exist as me.
I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to realise that I have always been asleep – the actual sleeping of me as the manifested experience thereof is proof – as the mind exists always, the mind is always active – and thus proof that I have never actually practically lived before as who I am as the breath as the moment as me
I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to realise that I have never actually practically lived as who I am as the breath as the moment as me – but that I have always accepted and allowed the mind to control / direct and influence me through believing and perceiving that who I am is thoughts/feelings and emotions
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to separate myself from the human physical body of life – from the breath – not realising that breath is life as me nurturing the expression and manifestation of life as the human physical body as me – I am breath – I am human physical body – I am here – I am moment
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be submerged within and as myself through allowing and accepting myself to be and become the mind consciousness system – because I have believed the lie that I need to be and become the mind consciousness system to survive and exist within and as the unified consciousness field
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be and become the mind consciousness system – to be of thoughts, feelings and emotions – because it’s what and who everyone else has become as those that have gone before me which I have believed and trusted to be ‘my example’ –instead of realising I am the unconditional innocence of self expression of life that exist as the moment as the breath of life as me – the simplicity of practical living exist here as the moment as the breath within and as oneness and equality as the human physical body as the manifestation of life as life of me as me
I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to realise that I am simplicity
I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to realise that I am breath as life of life as me
I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to realise that the very manifestation of creation as me of life within and as oneness and equality is here as the human physical body of the breath of life as me
